This is the question I get ALL the time when I talk to people about weight-loss; “How much SHOULD I weigh?” When people ask me this question, it is not as simple as blurting out a number. Everyone is a different shape and body type and the number does not always reflect your health.
When I was absolutely obsessed with my weight, I would get discouraged because I could never seem to get below 125 pounds. I would work out, barely eat, and still the weight wouldn’t budge. I finally accepted that I just wasn’t meant to be below that number (after lots of self-help) and have found what I have heard to be called my “happy weight.”
Your happy weight is the number or measurements (for those that do not use the scale) that your body can maintain without dieting and maintaining a moderate exercise regimen.
When I used to kill myself at the gym and obsessively count calories in order to be below 130 pounds, I was NOT at a happy weight for my body. I suffered irregular periods, mood swings, cravings, anxiety, was unhappy, and always scrutinizing every inch of my body. Only within the last couple years have I realized that I do not have the body type to comfortably get below 130 pounds and I am okay with this!! At 130-133 pounds, I eat what I want, I exercise when I can, and I just feel good about how I look! I’m happy (for the most part…I am still female after all) because I have found my “happy weight.”
Today I want to help YOU find your happy weight. With the New Year right around the corner, many of your goals are to lose weight or hopefully more along the lines of GET HEALTHY!! So how can you accomplish this? How can YOU find your happy weight? For starters, I want you to ask yourself a few questions:
- How do I feel; sluggish? run down? energetic? happy?
- Am I in shape; Can I easily run a mile? Do I struggle to walk up the stairs? Am I flexible? Do I work out regularly (3-5 days a week?)
- What are my stats; cholesterol, blood pressure, blood sugar, etc?
- What are my eating habits like; lots of produce? lots of fast food? too many sweets? skipping meals? balanced meals?
- What is my waist to hip ratio? See below.
Waist to Hip Ratio:
A measurement of the circumference of your waist in relation to your hips. Take the measurement of the smallest part of your waist (usually just above the belly button) and divide that by the total circumference of your hip (at the widest part).
Male WHR
- Less than 9 – low risk of cardiovascular health problems
- 0.9 to 0.99 – moderate risk of cardiovascular health problems
- 1 or over – high risk of cardiovascular problems
Female WHR
- Less than 0.8 – low risk of cardiovascular health problems
- 0.8 to 0.89 – moderate risk of cardiovascular health problems
- 0.9 or over – high risk of cardiovascular problems
The waist to hip ratio is a better indicator in measuring risk of developing serious health conditions than BMI, which does not take in to account muscle mass, waist, chest, hip measurements, or bone density. Someone that is an Olympic athlete might have a BMI higher than your average couch potato, even though that couch potato may have a beer gut and the athlete rocks a six pack of abs. Using just a BMI, the couch potato would be considered healthier. BMI tends to underestimate the amount of body fat in an overweight/obese person and overestimates body fat in very lean or muscular people.
Many studies demonstrate that those with apple-shaped bodies (who have larger waist-to-hip ratios), have an increased risk for health problems compared to those with pear shaped bodies (or those with lower waist to hip ratios). More fat around the middle has been linked to higher incidence of health problems due to the amount of fat surrounding your internal organs.
If you ask yourself these questions and find that you are always full of energy, get plenty of exercise, eat healthy and balanced, and have stats that are within the normal/healthy range, then you are probably at a place where you have found your happy weight (whether that is more or less than your personal “ideal”). However, if you visit the drive thru more than once every few weeks, lack the energy to get up the stairs, or have high cholesterol or blood pressure…chances are you might not be at your happy weight (whether your weight is too high OR too low!!).
My goal for you is not to begin obsessing about the number on the scale. I’ve been there and done that and it is NO fun. My goal for you is to accept where you are RIGHT NOW and work to make gradual changes toward a healthy lifestyle. Your weight will naturally melt away to its happy weight (if it needs to), the more healthy habits you incorporate: exercising, listening to your hunger and fullness signals, eating lots of produce, limiting animal products, and of course, consuming less sugar. We have all had a “magic number” in our minds that we feel is our ideal body weight, but sometimes our bodies know otherwise. Trust in yourself, love who you are, be healthy and active, and you too will find your happy weight!
Great post! You’re absolutely right, a healthy weight is based on many factors.
[...] a major health risk. You CAN be healthy and considered overweight. But as I said in my post about finding your happy weight (a must-read if you have not already), you need to look at other factors of wellness. Just because [...]
Oh this is so very hard…very very hard. My “happy weight” seems to be at a weight higher than what I am mentally happy at..does that make sense.
Your 130-133 is my 118-120, but mentally I feel ‘happier’ when I am about 112 or so. Gah!
Perhaps I should aim for the middle?
Ugh, I went through that SAME exact thing (and even same “goal weight”) which just isn’t realistic for my body. Now my weight fluctuates a bit, but is always +/- 2 pounds. I’m so glad that I’ve reached my happy weight and it no longer consumes me!
What a fantastic post!! I think that women feel a lot of pressure to look a certain way or be a certain weight based on external messages. You are right when you say that each individual has to find their own happy weight and that it is one that is easily maintained. I have tried to maintain a weight which was unaturally low for me and it was horrible; who would want to spend their life restriciting what they ate? Not me, so I am just trying to accept where I am at present and work towards making good choices.
Great post! I think it’s so important to find your happy weight and not get obsessed with a number on the scale. I had a certain number stuck in my head for a very long time. And it was too low for me to maintain on a longterm basis. And it became a real problem when I added a lot of weight lifting to my routine as I added some muscle.
This is a great post – I struggled for years at fighting my “happy weight” which I’m still gaining for!
Awesome post, as always. I have to say, this is something I obsess about. I’m forever worrying about what my correct weight should be as over the last 10 years it has gone up and down 2 stone a number of times. Some people say I look a healthy weight, others say I’m too thin and it just confuses me. But, when it comes down to it, I just want to be healthy. When we’re healthy our weight will be healthy for us as individuals, as you said.
Happy new year for tomorrow! xxx
Wonderful post! My goal for 2011 (again) is to get to my happy weight. PCOS doesn’t want me there, but it is a healthy, happy weight for me where I feel my best and it’s maintainable for me.
What a great post! This is something I am definitely working on right now. My ideal weight and my bodies happy weight are about 5 lbs apart, but I am learning to deal with that and thank my body for everything it does for me!
im gonna work so hard to build up more muscle and eventually get my weight up to its ‘right’ level. it tends not to be changing too much now which is a good sign, inching towards that perfect healthy stability for itself <3
Wonderful topic! You are right on what your advice Erin!
It’s true that sometimes your ideal weight and happy weight may not be the same. Once you find a comfortable and healthy weight, your body tells you it’s right.
this is one thing about WW I do not agree with…their “charts” to follow to get to goal. Goal may be different for one person than another who are the same height…I guess they do allow a doctor to choose a “happy weight” for you to be at goal though.
GREAT POST and topic! I love your emphasis on healthy living rather than ridiculous obsessions!
Thanks for posting this- it’s definitely something I struggle with day to day, and I need to remember to be happy with what is right for me!
Such a great, informative post! I would say that I’ve found my happy weight-as this is the best I’ve felt in years!
such a great post! after getting rid of my scale this year i have never been more free of my “weight” that i have in the past 7 years! drives me crazy! but i’m glad to say i’ve found my happy weight, and i don’t even really know what it is! having no scale helps me recognize how my body can be comfortable just the way it is!
What a great post! I’m not at my happy weight yet…I can run a mile pretty well…but have been doing pretty poorly with my eating in the past few weeks. Time to get back on track!
THanks for the great reminder!
Great post! I agree that ‘healthy weight’ is so much more than a number on a scale. It’s about how you feel, your energy levels, your motivation to make healthy choices, and so much more. I love this time of year because I’m getting so motivated to make positive changes for my health – all parts of it. Thanks for the added inspiration!
i think this is a beautiful post!! Weight is such a trivial thing I have found. It just matters if you eat right, exercise and have energy. Our weight should not be something we really stress over so the concept of a happy weight is perfect
Love the information you provided us with in this post!
I too have a happy weight and while I’ve been below it before, that was due to not eating and exercising alot. My body is happier where I am now because it is not feeling deprivation.
I am not obsessive about my eating or exercising habits and I think that makes it much more enjoyable!
I love this post. I can definitely tell a difference in the way my body feels when it’s not at a happy weight. At my happy weight, I just feel good and energized – if it’s too low/high, I feel differently. I try to rely on my body’s cues vs the scale to tell my happy weight because the scale brings up negative feelings about my weight & body.
I think that this is my favorite post of yours ever. And I’ll tell you why. 1. While I have never been obsessive, I’ve struggled with poor body image, even when I was in the lower end of my weight range (WAYY back in high school when I was very active with cheerleading). 2. I’ve learned on my own that when I’m practicing good eating habits, not overloading on sugar and exercising regularly, I lose weight much easier than when I’m attempting to cut too much out of my life and exercise for the wrong reasons. 3. For so many years, I’ve envied girls with narrow hips compared to my own pear shape. Since I started blogging, I’ve been trying to cut out fat talk, accept my body for the shape it is, be happy with where I am now, while continuing to develop happy habits. Yay!
Thank you so much for posting this. I could not need a post outlining the points any more than at a time like now. (Sorry that was a poorly structured sentence). Anyways, a million thanks for this healthy perspective
OK, You’ve given me a lot to think about here. I’m going to spend the day thinking about my goals. I was intending to make losing “the last 10 pounds” my goal for the next 2 months, but now I’m not sure about that. I may already be at my happy weight. But I’ve never NOT wanted to lose at least 10 pounds. Hmmmmm.
This was another great post. I’m actually trying to gain weight right now…because according to BMI, I’m too low. Part of me questions if I should be doing this because I have great energy, and I eat a healthy diet. Thankfully, I’m working with a dietitian, so I know I need to trust her advice. Thank you for sharing this wisdom with me. I hope you are having a day full of love and joy!
YOu know I’m a big believer in the happy weight. And while, yes, getting there may take some work for some people…the work still boils down to adopting healthy habits. Great post!
Loving this post, Erin!!! We are all so obsessed with the scale. I am sure you hear is daily from patients, as I do with clients! No matter how many times I explain how fat takes up more room and is light, and how muscle is dense and looks better…they still want a magic number on the scale. You look fantastic and super tiny at your happy weight!!! So glad you are positive and don’t get caught up over the scale anymore!!!
Oh, and thank you SO MUCH for the positive love and thoughts for Munchkin, he is recovering now they were able to scope out the Q-tip
I think I’m about the same as you. I “can” get down to under 130. But it’s usually only for a fleeting moment and requires an extensive amount of effort. I’m much happier at around 130ish. I don’t have to think about it. Nor do I step on the scale obsessing over if I’m there or not… it’s nice!
Go Erin! =)
I’m at my happy weight and I have found out the hard way that my happy weight, though lean, includes perpetual muffin top. My pants aren’t even that tight! Even in a dress I have little muffins. oh boo. Thanks mom!
hahaha
Fantastic post!!! Thank you!!
I read this and though “RIGHT ON!”
I always have tonnes of energy. I can run long distance, do yoga, and lift heavy weights. My blood pressure is good and my W:H ratio is under 0.8. Although I could definitely stand to eat less sweets, I think overall I’m ok. Even though I’ve been stressing (or trying not to stress) about being 15lb heavier than my happy weight.
http://gamereviewwiki.com/bikinibirthday/2010/12/23/get-comfortable/
Great post! I finally, this past year, found my happy weight. I actually weight less now than I did on my wedding day which is kind of funny to me, because back then I was so obsessive, and now, I’m not at all.
